Couples Therapy
I am expanding my practice to include a more specific approach to couple and relationship counselling using Gottman Method Couples Therapy.
I am passionate about working with couples to address their current concerns and relationship problems.
Therapy is only available in face-to-face format at the moment.
About Gottman Couples Therapy
The Gottman Method Couples Therapy is backed up by decades of research findings showing benefits and successful treatment outcomes for couples.
Gottman Couples Therapy aims to deepen the understanding between couples and to explore and learn more effective ways to relate, communicate and solve problems when they arise. Sometimes these problems appear to involve a pattern of conflict which seems to be repeated and can feel difficult to get past or through.
The Gottman Method involves a thorough assessment followed by treatment planning, outlined below. Your active engagement and involvement is important so that we can gain a thorough understanding of the issues which bother you, this includes your history as a couple and as individuals.
Key Messages From the Gottman Couple Therapy Model
The Gottman Model estimates that in most couples about 31% of problems are solvable whereas about 69% represent perpetual problems which recur over time.
In Gottman Couples Therapy the emphasis is on how you manage your relationship, especially disagreements and conflicts, this approach emphasises the value of learning new strategies to manage and repair communication and any conflicts.
Enhancing trust and helpful conversations: How couples communicate during a conflict can have an important impact on the outcomes and ongoing feelings of safety and security. What we say and the way we say things to each other has an important impact on how we feel about the relationship. Trust and communication are enhanced when couples can engage in a pattern of communication which fosters respect, admiration, compassion, and appreciation.
In general, couples who report feeling happy and satisfied tend to be able to manage disagreements without hurting each other’s feelings. They feel genuinely responsive, interested and engaged with their partner. These couples learn to tolerate their differences without these differences damaging the whole relationship. They have worked out coping and communication strategies which support each other.
The Gottman Couples Therapy approach identifies four unhelpful communication patterns which unfold in ways that feel toxic and undermining. These are:
Criticism (real or perceived)
Defensiveness (disapproval, putting someone down, undermining the other)
Contempt (disrespect, mocking, eye rolling, sneering)
Stonewalling (tuning out, turning away, ignoring, withdrawal from interaction)
When couples have reached the point where their communication patterns feel like those described above they may feel that efforts to communicate constantly go wrong or are mis-interpreted resulting in frustration and hurt.
The Gottman method has proven to be an effective well researched model for enhancing relationship satisfaction.
The Gottman Couples Therapy Model
Therapy approach consists of three components: a thorough assessment and feedback and development of a treatment plan involving a series of effective interventions.
The assessment identifies how you see the challenging areas of your relationship. Over the last 40 years, Drs. John and Julie Gottman developed scientifically proven intervention techniques that have helped many thousands of couples to a more joyful and satisfying relationship.
We will use these powerful interventions to strengthen your bond as a couple.
As with any new skill, practice makes perfect!
Assessment Phase
The assessment phase includes an initial joint assessment with me, after this you will each complete a series of online questionnaires. Two further individual assessment sessions are conducted, followed by a joint feedback session.
The feedback session involves a review of the assessment sessions and questionnaire results together with an introduction to the Gottman Model and clarifies your shared goals for the treatment phase.
The Treatment Phase
This phase is tailored to your situation as a couple. Treatment involves weekly sessions of 60—90 minutes for a few weeks, following which these may be less frequent.
Evidence suggests that initially frequent sessions can assist couples to resolve issues by enhancing communication skills and reducing conflict increasing confidence in your ability to get through previously challenging problems.
Gottman Method Couples Therapy has a focus on supporting couples to develop better patterns of communication. Improved communication supports you to have more helpful and constructive conversations and to manage conflict more effectively.
The goal is to increase and enhance your sense of trust, commitment, connection, and relationship satisfaction.
Scheduling treatment sessions weekly is recommended to allow rapid integration of skills and techniques that support and enhance your communication and reduce conflict skills.
Couple Therapy Process
Assessment Phase
Session 1 involves a joint assessment of 60-75 minutes
Completion of online questionnaires (cost is covered by my fees)
Two individual sessions 60-minute sessions (cost is per person each)
Session 3 involves a 90-minute joint feedback session and treatment planning.
Treatment Phase
Joint 60-minute sessions (initially at weekly intervals)
If you decide to proceed, please contact me for a preliminary telephone discussion.